Facing Loss as a Survivor

Still With You

Today I am sharing with an open heart, and with many prayers of healing and comfort to the cancer survivors/warriors/advocates who are reading today’s post. This week another friend who had cancer walked on, and this has brought me to thinking how many of us have lost friends and loved ones to this disease, and how that may affect those of us who have had cancer.

When one of your friends does not survive cancer, it can cause many confusing feelings within you. This happens, and sometimes makes dealing with the grief confusing.

I have lost several friends to this disease through the years. In the beginning it was difficult, I lost one of my best friends who went through chemo with me, and I had to learn how to process the grief, and the confusing feelings of being the one who survived when my friend did not…

I went to a cancer support group for a little bit to talk with those who would understand how confusing the grief could be for those who have had cancer. I wrote a lot about my friend in a journal; I shared the good memories, and I focused on what a beautiful spirit she was. I honored my feelings, and then I decided to honor her memory by the work that I do.

Realize my friends, we all grieve differently and there is no timeline in how long your feelings, your grief may last. Please ask for help to process your grief.  Take care of yourself during this time. Please get support from those who will understand, ask your traditional healer, your provider, your oncology social worker, or contact your local hospice office, to ask for resources and help to process your feelings, your grief.

Please honor your feelings, and honor your loved one. You’re not alone.  I wish you peace, wellness and strength.

Resources for Grief:

Grief and Loss: http://www.caringinfo.org/i4a/pages/index.cfm?pageid=3367

Coping with Grief: http://kidshealth.org/en/teens/coping-grief.html

Hospice: http://www.hospicenet.org/html/bereavement.html

Coping with Guilt: http://www.cancer.net/coping-with-cancer/managing-emotions/coping-with-guilt

Moving beyond survivor guilt: http://www.cancercenter.com/community/thrive/moving-beyond-survivor-guilt/

 

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